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| Kumpulan Contoh Spoof Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015 |
Kumpulan Contoh Spoof Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015 - Bagi
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Okey langsung saja ini dia Kumpulan Contoh Spoof Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015 :
Contoh 1 :
One
day, a farmer, who was well- known in his village as a very mean man, said “I
will give three meals and twenty five pence to anyone who is willing to do a
day’s work for me. This offer was accepted by a hungry tramp, who was more
interested in the meals than the money.
“
You can have your breakfast first”, said the farmer, “and then you can start
work”. After the farmer had given him a very small breakfast, he said, “Now you
can have your dinner. This will save us a lot of time.” The tramp agreed, and
ate poor dinner. When he had finished, the farmer said, “What would you say to
having supper also while you are about it?”
“I
will try”, replied the tramp, “to enjoy another meal”. Then he had his supper,
which again was not a very filling meal.
When
it was over, the farmer looked very pleased and said, “Now you can do a long
day’s work”.
“No, thank you”, was the tramp’s reply, as he rose
to leave, “I never work after supper!”
Contoh 2 :
The Smartest Parrot
Once upon time, a man had a wonderful parrot.
There was no other parrot like it. The parrot could say every word, except one
word. The parrot would not say the name of the place where it was born. The
name of the place was Catano.
The man felt excited having the smartest
parrot but he could not understand why the parrot would not say Catano. The man
tried to teach the bird to say Catano however the bird kept not saying the
word.
At the first, the man was very nice to the
bird but then he got very angry. “You stupid bird!” pointed the man to the
parrot. “Why can’t you say the word? Say Catano! Or I will kill you,” the man
said angrily. Although he tried hard to teach, the parrot would not say it.
Then the man got so angry and shouted to the bird over and over; “Say Catano or
I’ll kill you”. The bird kept not to say the word of Catano.
One day, after he had been trying so many
times to make the bird say Catano, the man really got very angry. He could not
bear it. He picked the parrot and threw it into the chicken house. There were
four old chickens for next dinner “You are as stupid as the chickens. Just stay
with them,” said the man angrily. Then he continued to humble; “You know, I
will cut the chicken for my meal. Next it will be your turn, I will eat you
too, stupid parrot”. After that he left the chicken house.
The next day, the man came back to the
chicken house. He opened the door and was very surprised. He could not believe
what he saw at the chicken house. There were three death chickens on the floor.
At the moment, the parrot was standing proudly and screaming at the last old
chicken; “Say Catano or I’ll kill you”.
Contoh 3 :
A Small Experiment
An elderly gentleman of 85 feared his wife was getting hard of hearing.
So one day he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing
checked. The Doctor made an appointment for a hearing test in two weeks, and
meanwhile there’s a simple informal test the husband could do to give the
doctor some idea of the state of her problem.
“Here’s what you do,” said the doctor, “start out about 40 feet away
from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If
not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get response.
That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he’s in the
living room. He says to himself, “I’m about 40 feet away, let’s see what
happens.”
Then in a normal tone he asks, “Honey, what’s for supper?” No response.
So the husband moved to the other end of the room, about 30 feet from
his wife and repeats, “Honey, what’s for supper?” Still no response.
Next, he moves into the dining
room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, “Honey, what’s for
supper?” Again he gets no response.
So he walks up to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. “Honey, what’s
for supper?” Again So he walks right up behind her. “Honey, what’s for supper?”
“Damn it Earl, for the fifth time, CHICKEN!”
Contoh 4 :
The
Blonde and the Lawyer
A blonde and a lawyer are seated next
to each other on a flight from LA to NY.
The lawyer asks if she would like to
play a fun game.
The blonde, tired, just wants to take a
nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The
lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, “I ask you a question, and if
you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and
vice versa.”
Again,
she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says,
“Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the
answer, I will pay $500.00.
This catches the blonde’s attention
and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to
the game. The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the
earth to the moon?” The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse,
pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “Okay” says the lawyer,
“your turn.”
She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a
hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?” The lawyer, puzzled, takes
out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps
into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of
congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and
coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.
The blonde says, “Thank you”, and turns
back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little
miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?” Without a word,
the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, goes back to sleep.
Contoh 5 :
The Archer and the Trumpeter were
traveling together in a lonely place. The Archer boasted of his skill as a
warrior, and asked the Trumpeter if he bore arms.
“No,
“replied the Trumpeter, “I cannot fight. I can only blow my horn, and make music
for those who are at war.”
“But
I can hit a mark at a hundred pieces,” said the Archer. As he spoke, an eagle
appeared, hovering over the tree tops. He drew out an arrow, fitted it on the
string, shot at the bird, which straightway fell to the ground, transfixed to
the heart.
“I
am not afraid of any foe for the bird might just as well have been a man,” said
the Archer proudly. “But you would be quite helpless if anyone attacked you.”
They
saw at that moment a band of robbers approaching them with drawn swords. The
Archer immediately discharged a sharp arrow, which laid low the foremost of the
wicked men. But the rest soon overpowered and bound his hands.
“As
for this Trumpeter, he can do us no harm, for he has neither sword nor bow,”
they said, and did not bind him, but took away his purse and wallet.
Then
Trumpeter said, “You are welcome friends, but let me play you a tune on my
horn.”
With
their consent he blew loud and long on his trumpet, and in a short space of
time the guards of the King came running up at the sound, and surrounded the
robbers and carried them off to the prison.
When
they unbound the hands of the Archer, he said to the Trumpeter, “Friend, I have
learned today that a trumpet is better than a bow; for you have saved our lives
without doing harm to anyone.”
BACA JUGA : Kumpulan Contoh Advertisement Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015
BACA JUGA : Kumpulan Contoh Spoof Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015
BACA JUGA : Kumpulan Contoh Explanation Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015
BACA JUGA : Kumpulan Contoh Discussion Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015
BACA JUGA : Kumpulan Contoh Review Text Bahasa Inggris Terbaru 2015
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